1.09.2009

When Christmas Lingers Too ... Widely

There are many things that seem to escape containment after Christmas. There’s always an ornament that slipped under the couch which you find in February. A card with a smiling baby in a Santa hat is uncovered in a stack of unopened junk mail. A tangle of tinsel sticks on your black pants which you only notice after you’ve met with about 40 people at a “dress for success” workshop. Which you're leading.

But there is one part of Christmas that is lingering a bit too prominently.

For years now I’ve been in hiding. Seriously hiding. Of course, I can share this with you because I know you won’t tell anyone.

As we all know, the first step is admitting you have a problem. I’m GREAT at the first step. I’m a confessional type, always ready to toss myself on the mercy of the court. But saying it out loud to a large group of people… well, perhaps it’ll be cleansing.

I’m speaking, of course of my egg nog “issue.”

Yes, my seasonal egg nog addiction got a wee bit out of control. You know it’s bad when you have to make sure you’ve got a candy cane in your pocket so your breath won’t give away that you’ve snuck into the kitchen for your 4th glass of egg nog. In the last hour.

So, needless to say, I’ve got a bit of an egg nog belly. I’m back in sweats and baggy sweaters, waiting for this week to go by, the final week where the grocery store will pull the last 5 million calories off their shelves. In fact I’m forbidding myself to come within 50 feet of the dairy aisle.

It’s the only thing that saves me every year – The Egg Nog Law. The fact that they don’t sell real egg nog beyond mid January. Apparently it’s actually illegal to sell egg nog unless it’s in a can after January 15th.

Fortunately I’m never even tempted by the canned stuff. No, for me it’s got to be the full bodied, cows in Santa hats, red and green label, thick and creamy with a hint of …

I better stop myself. If I can just hold out for a few more weeks, I might stave off further … expansion.

Then again, it does only come once a year… And baggy sweaters are in, right?