I have no idea what to write about this week. I knew this
would happen, when we’d finally have a fairly ordinary weekend and nothing
funny would have happened and I’d be scrambling for something amusing to say.
Sure, there was the truck we saw pulling out of Bucee’s
hauling a trailer loaded with about a dozen port a johns. Such a sight can
never go by without comment amongst the Prosapio, of course, and we immediately
started shouting out possible collective noun options – was that a passel of
potties? A jumble of johns? Or a
port-a-posse?
Funny, sure. But trust me; a teetering trailer of toilets is
not enough to build a column on.
Then there was the day when I realized that I can’t travel
with another group of adults without resorting to embarrassing parenting
behavior. I’m not just talking about throwing my arm out to keep someone safe
when we come to a sudden stop, either (although that’s pretty bad). I’m talking
about encouraging grown adults to use the “facilities” because it’s a long way
to the next stop.
But that’s barely a paragraph! I’ve still got nothing!
Unless you count the time when we were in the checkout line
and we were bantering with one another about something when suddenly Sierra
stopped and looked at me and said “Do you ever notice that we are the only ones
talking in check out lines?”
Yes, honey. Actually I have. Not that that stops us,
apparently, much to the dismay of long suffering retail employees everywhere.
Then there’s the moment when I’m trying to write my column
at the eleventh hour and in a total state of PANIC when some little person
comes up because she hasn’t been able to sleep. And a tiny part of me is hoping
something funny will come up while we’re trying to work through the things that
have kept her up, fretting about band practice.
Nada! The entire experience was completely without value as
humor column fodder! It’s all I can do to refrain from shouting WORK WITH ME,
PEOPLE!
Granted, we watched a
couple of amusing YouTube videos, but what good was that? It’s not like anyone
wants to read about the video where the woman laughs for five minutes because
she’s making swishy faces with her computer program. But if you have a minute,
you really should watch it, it was hysterical.
Because, frankly folks, I got nothing.
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